Why is it so hard?
You’ve probably heard this a lot (or maybe you haven’t) that you should forgive people. Even when they wrong you, or hurt you, forgive them.
The reason forgiving people who hurt us is so hard is because when we have been wronged, we feel that we are right to hold a grudge, but you need to remember that forgiveness is deciding that you’d rather be happy than right.
Forgiveness isn’t about going back to the way things were (before someone wronged you), it’s about moving on, admitting to yourself that you were hurt, and letting go of the resentment that now plagues you. You’re allowing yourself the freedom to move on.
Forgiveness means that given the chance to retaliate, you choose not to. It means that you learn from this trial, rather than carry it with you as deadweight.
“Holding on to resentment is like taking poison and waiting for your enemies to die.”
Forgiveness is tremendously important in Islam, and the rewards are so great.
And the retribution for an evil act is an evil one like it, but whoever pardons and makes reconciliation - his reward is [due] from Allah. Indeed, He does not like wrongdoers. Surah Ash- Shuraa [42:40]
Forgiving someone is not easy, and it takes strength, but doing so is amazing for you and your mental health. Being psychologically healthy means that you have the means to take care for yourself physically as well.
Allah the Almighty has said: “O son of Adam, so long as you call upon Me and ask of Me, I shall forgive you for what you have done, and I shall not mind. O son of Adam, were your sins to reach the clouds of the sky and were you then to ask forgiveness of Me, I would forgive you. O son of Adam, were you to come to Me with sins nearly as great as the earth and were you then to face Me, ascribing no partner to Me, I would bring you forgiveness nearly as great as its.”
If we can be so easily forgiven, shouldn’t we be able to forgive others?
Forgiveness is not about them, it’s only about you.
Writer, student, and a lover of art.